Finding the Magic in the Mess

CK OGLETREE — May 15, 2023

Focusing on one thing at a time is a challenge, but it is imperative when there are a lot of things competing for your attention. There will ALWAYS be a lot of things competing for your attention. When you are in the middle of the mess, you often miss the magic.

Focus is a key component to finding the magic in the mess.

A while back, I wrote this note to myself: ONE thing at a time with FAITH and INTENTION.

At the time, my mind was everywhere, more so than usual. I was experiencing so much change. So much goodness and new possibility, and also so much grief and pain. I knew I needed to do something differently. I wanted to do so many things differently. I wanted to start them all now and have finished most of them yesterday (know anyone that can relate??)! But, when I gave myself a moment to listen to the wisdom around me, my inner voice, and my God… it all pointed to LESS. 

It can be a monumental challenge for some of us to focus on one thing at a time (especially ADHD & neurodivergent identifying folks like myself). We fight it. We believe it can’t be done. Or worse, we believe it SHOULDN’T be done. 

Most of us know by now that multitasking is not effective, yet we keep trying. Why?

The answer to this will be different for everyone. There are many factors that are overlapped and intertwined for each of us humxns.

For me it was the ingrained hustle culture, a lack of clarity, and a lack of faith that one thing at a time can be a recipe for success (no matter who’s definition of success I was using). It was personal, it was cultural, and it was systemic.

I have worked my tail off to untangle all the confusion I have been experiencing surrounding this life I have, and the life I want to create. My work, my impact, my legacy, my WHY. Guess what, there are a lot of strings to untangle. I am not finished, but I am finally enjoying the process.

Just like untangling a mess of real strings, it’s best to focus on one at a time.

Often we will try to get away with working on a few at a time, then we cause a new tangle and our prior progress is thwarted. 

One thing I am proud to name and claim about myself is that I have always been comfortable asking for help, though perhaps not always in the most timely manner. While I may carry shame about other things, getting help has never been one of them.

I sat here with my tangled mess of strings trying to figure so much out on my own for a while (probably too long), and then I started asking for and accepting help. I’ve enlisted friends, family, colleagues, therapists, and coaches. I allowed them to be on this journey with me. I allowed them to provide their support in the ways they could.

Was I afraid sometimes. YES
Was I hesitant sometimes. YES
Was I skeptical sometimes. YES
Was I downright resistant and contrarian sometimes. YES

Am I all of this STILL sometimes. ABSOLUTELY YES!

Ultimately, though, I started to trust myself and my community, and I listened to the call for focus.

I was also very lucky because I knew the magic was in there. I could FEEL it. When I allowed myself to get out of my head for a bit and to reengage my intuition and my creativity in a new a more vibrant way, I started to KNOW it. As I started to fortify my knowing, my village started to be able to reflect it all back to me. Then I could SEE it again.

Other folks started to see it, too.

This type of evolution is not a fast process. There are NO QUICK FIXES. Occasionally we have to double back to reassess things we thought were “handled.” (Still visualizing that ball of tangled string?).

When you’ve got a partner helping you build and direct your focus, however, your capacity to manage more grows.

Note that no one has FIXED the mess. We’ve just worked together to illuminate the magic within… Just enough to spark renewed energy for the process. Once I realized fixing it was not the ultimate goal, I could get on with the business of focusing.

I know I can be an anomaly, though. I have so much gratitude for each assist on my journey. Still, I know that it can be challenging and often downright painful for some folks to seek or accept help, for things big and small. It often takes us a little while to realize that things have gotten a bit more complicated and we are at the edges of our current capacity. Other times, though, we experience such a pressing discontent with the current course of action that it can no longer be tolerated. At some point or another, we know some sort of new perspective or new energy is imperative.

Are you sensing a shift?

Are you searching for more clarity?

Are you feeling like you are tangled up and can’t figure out which strings to pull next? 

Are you trying to fix all the things and pursue all the options and finding yourself running in circles and exhausted?

I am here to tell you there IS magic in the mess, but you have to thoughtfully and carefully engage with the mess to get to the magic. 

Focus is a key component to finding the magic in the mess.

Accepting an assist can increase your capacity and make the process more enjoyable.

The world is waiting for what you’ve got to offer.

Perhaps Forest Moonlight can provide just the assist you need to gain more clarity, make more impact, and spark new energy for the process ahead.

Subscriber First Name if you think you or your team might benefit from a partner to help guide your hand and steady your resolve, let’s talk.

Until then, Be Well!

💛 CKO

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Thank you for your intention and attention, and for being part of the Holistic Wealth & Wellness movement.

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